Bzzzzz, beep.

'I've got 2 pairs of your pyjama bottoms and those slobbing trousers i bought you from gap here. Could I maybe send you them?'

'Sure if you want to, obviously your new bit of stuff is going to be needing the drawer space. You don't mention the top I slept in, will you be keeping that as a reminder? No hurry though. I have a large pile of your stuff here, do you want it?'

'Ummmm what is there? Is there a lot?'

'I'm not sure, I haven't looked at it for months, [Flatmate] shoved it all in bags for life a) because I couldn't get off the floor with grief, b) I was shouting something about lighter fuel, and c) she's a much neater packer than me, and it's been behind my door since.'
 
'Well I was just wondring how much there was, to save you postage'

'Well I'd ask you to pay for it but seeing as I owe you £300 I won't mention that Well I don't think I'm going to be able to go through yet, not on my own anyway. So there we go. The thought of handling your clothes that probably still smell of you and have random hairs on them is too hard.'

'That's cool, i'm not in a rush for it'

And so the pile remains...